Tears, Sweat, and Allusions lyrics

Turned off by fear
And I cant remember what to do
I cant remember how to act
Dont remember whats true
I dont know where to turn to,
answers arent too clear
Or maybe they are truths to which we cant hear
Left alone and waiting, waiting for a cue
Tired of pretending of knowing what to do
Ill run away into the night
Ill leave him here alone
Leave all this behind left to be unknown
Ill finally fall down to my knees
Ill turn away and forget my memories
I cant explain the way
Ive felt for him from the very start
But everytime I see him it just breaks my heart
Love is an allusion lived in fantasies
Reality is more confusion of that from which we flee
Life is cold and bitter we must struggle to survive
Dreams and my allusions are what keeps me alive
I dont know where to turn to, answers arent too clear
Or maybe they are truths to which we cant hear
Left alone and waiting, waiting for a cue
Tired of pretending of knowing what to do
Wounds cant heal when they keep tearing open
I cant see straight cant see whos my friend
Who Ive loved has always been stolen
Im always driven out in the end
People take but do nothing because hes not mine
Why does this shit always happen all the god damn time
Im sick of it all I cant go with out him in my life
Im tired of all this pretending im tired of all the strife
Again return these feelings of anguish and dispair
Again comes this chocking pain that
I cant stand to bear
I dont know where to turn to,
answers arent too clear
Or maybe they are truths to which we cant hear
Left alone and waiting, waiting for a cue
Tired of pretending of knowing what to do